You know you have lived in Spain too long, when:

You just love eating pickled garlic (and pickled baby figs)
Both sugar and Leche Condensada are normal in a very very small coffee
Adding fanta orange, still lemon drink, or even cola to red wine is acceptable, especially lunch times
You are surprised when the Spanish workman, ie electrician/plumber/decorator turns up on time, usually he doesn´t bother to turn up at all
You don´t go to any office at around 11 am as this is the time (about) for the staff to disappear for breakfast at the local cafe or have a 30 minute ciggy break
You don´t shout at people who use your car bumper to help them when trying to park in a very tight spot
When you live in the mountains of Granada, thunder storms while it is snowing are normal
You think it’s okay to comment on every-one’s appearance or to openly stare at strangers who wonder into your Barrio
You are amazed when Spanish TV breaks for adverts last less than half an hour, especially just before the end of films
You forget to say please when asking for things after all it is implied in your tone of voice
You eat lunch around 2 to 3 pm, never have your evening meal before 9.30 pm
You know that there is little point in going shopping after 2 pm, just take a siesta until 5 pm (or sometimes 6 pm) when the shops re-open
You expect beer to be ice-cold and won´t accpet anything else
You like to dunk cakes in horchata for a lovely late breakfast
On Fiesta mornings and Sundays, you have breakfast just before going to bed rather than after you get up
Blonde women from northern Europe actually think their name is rubia
You can eat up to 5 times a day - first breakfast, followed by second breakfast around 11.00, almuerzo, merienda, cena - and you don´t put on any weight
You answer the phone by saying ¿Diga? or just “Yes” and finish the call by just hanging up
You prefer UHT milk and think the Brits who say they sell “fresh milk like at home” are just slightly mad
You cannot understand why anyone would want to continue living in the United Kingdom
It is normal for young men (sometimes older men) to be chased down the street by a load of stampeding bulls
A small brandy on a morning with your coffee before work is normal and a beer with second breakfast followed by a “chaser”, some liqueur or other (lemon and some sort of herbal drinks seems common)
You actually enjoy Spanish tele